Do what you love

Mum had a dream that began about seven years ago.

When Mum used to take me for pet grooming at Harrods, she would wander around The Pet Kingdom and shook her head in disbelief at the range of dog clothing. But as time went on and I ended up sleeping in her bed, she needed to keep me relatively dirt free and not have to bathe me every time I’ve been out on the streets in the rain or after having walked the damp streets. She realised that there might be some benefits for me to put on a coat.

My first “dog coat” was merely a flap on my back and a velcro belt around my tummy. That was enough for keeping my back dry if it was raining but my underbelly, chest and especially my arm pits were wet and covered with grit.

Mum searched for coats which covered my chest and had sleeves, but she couldn’t find any that vaguely met her brief and that looked stylish.

She began asking anyone she knew in the dog coat trade to make coats for me. She was very definite about what she wanted them to look like. She already had a collection in mind and found a seamstress who did not live in London, didn’t really know nor like dogs and didn’t understand service delivery. It was a disastrous partnership. But in just showing her coats to one or two people, she unexpectedly began taking orders and had them made to order. She also very quickly realised how difficult it was to fit the different breeds of dogs. She had things made that fitted me but it was a problem fitting sausage dogs or even other cockapoos.

After about a year and a lot of trial and error, she parted ways with the seamstress and closed down the made-to-order business. But the dream lived on. And decided to give it another shot, first with a hobby seamstress but she eventually sought out professional pattern cutters and clothing manufacturers. She enjoyed looking for fabrics that worked with the various style of coats. As a result – I had a whole new wardrobe.

The collection would be called Darcy & George London. She had the logo designed and labels made. It was all very exciting.

When the collection was finally to her liking, she had them graded to size and produced prototypes. But alas, when it came to trying them other dogs, once again, it was again not straight forward – even with professional help. The pandemic didn’t help as and she couldn’t get dogs to try them on.

Months of lockdown passed and the Darcy & George Collection hung in our closet. A couple of weeks ago, she had an opportunity to have them professionally photographed. As soon as she saw the photographs, a strange idea crossed her mind. She knew she had fulfilled what she wanted to do. She had created a series of dog clothes that she liked.

Everyone who had seen the collection were amazed to the attention to detail and they loved the very English styling. They would go down well because every time we have been photographed in them, people would ask where they could buy them. As encouraged as she was, she also knew she didn’t have the energy, the determination nor the desire to make it into a business. And the financing of it would be too much of a commitment. She had crossed her own finishing line.

It seems such a pity after all the time, effort and investment in the project. Did she give up on her dream?

May’s comment: The whole process was a revelation. It seemed such a pity to give up at this stage but then It was recognising my own strength. I had reached my finishing line.

When things don’t work out and even when they do. It’s important to remember to celebrate your wins, whatever they look like. To some it might be selling a million books. To others?  Reaching a new finish line. (Ashley Brown)

Excerpts from Ashley’s latest blog – Do Your Thing

Sometimes doing your thing means walking away, accepting we are done and opening our hearts to something new. Isn’t that what life is meant for? To keep dancing with possibility? To find the things that light you up, let go of what doesn’t and spend your days doing what fills your soul? So why so often do we do the complete opposite? Staying in jobs and situations three years longer than feels good?  

This is what I came up with … 

People pleasing – Anyone else a people pleaser? I have people pleased myself into some awful corners. Piling my plate high with other people’s happiness while making little room for my own. I call it ‘yes’ syndrome. Taking it upon yourself to not let anyone down, which translates to not doing your thing. You soldier through a project, wishing you had the balls to walk away. You say yes to a party you would rather eat kangaroo balls than go to. Sound familiar? We have all been there.

 Breaking up with people-pleasing is hard, though it is a golden ticket to doing your thing. 

Eeek, failure – Failure must be the world’s biggest fear. Not that you would guess as it’s too scary to talk about for most of us. Instead, we try super hard to not fail at things we don’t even really want to do. Staying in relationships that no longer feel like home or sticking in jobs that give us the Monday scaries … every single day. We are trained to believe quitting is failure, when quite often its freedom. Doing your thing starts with redefining failure on your terms. 

Success baby – Hmm. Is keeping up with society’s photo-shopped idea of success making anyone happy? All this nonsense about the flashy car, perfect marriage, high-flying career… I am not buying it. Success is subjective and translates to doing your thing. It’s so easy to walk the stairway to success and arrive at the wrong door. Defining success on our terms takes courage. Does that mean a big bank balance and your name in lights? Or does that mean doing the things that light YOU up? Only you have the answers. 

Doing your thing requires honouring the fluidity of self. Here are a few things that can help … 

Let yourself adapt – You are born with the beautiful ability to change direction. Never forget this. No matter what (or who) you say yes to. You are allowed to change your mind, as many times as you wish. You are allowed to walk away from people, places and all the things that no longer serve you. Adapting is not failure. It is essential to living life to the full.

Detach from the noise – All those people, opinions, voices in your head. Tune out for a while. Take a walk, quiet the mind, take a break from the phone. Catch up with yourself, what do you want? Listen to the answers, they might surprise you.

Follow your heart – The compass inside of you is always waiting. Where does it want to go? Listening to your heart will always take you to the path that feels good, be brave enough to follow. 

Doing your thing need not be a side hustle, it can be your life, if you to dare let it. 

The question is are you ready to give it a go? 

Designing dog clothes was my thing for years. It was assumed that I was going to make a business out of it. I got as far as I could, crossing a lot of the creative hurdles, and then came one more hurdle that was overwhelming – fitting them to different dog sizes and breeds. And after that, the prospect of taking it further scared me. What a relief it was to realise that I have done what I loved, and that was enough for me.

However, I am thinking of approaching other people who might be interested in taking them on – piece by piece, the ones that may fit their own brief. So if you have any ideas, do let me know. It would be nice to see them in production and worn by other dogs.

THE STYLISH TRENCH

THE CUDDLY DUFFLE COAT – how much more cuter can they get? And THE CHIC CITY JACKET

THE COSY QUILTED JACKET made for cooler days in the city

THE WAXED JACKET to keep dry on wet days.

THE NEOPRENE JACKET to look stylish while out walking

I am really proud of what I had managed to create – all designed and made with LOVE.